Turn Off The Noise

It’s been 47 days since I’ve written a post. Life has been SO so so insane. It’s been a whirlwind since I left Chicago. Well, actually since I started packing which was shortly after my last post. I packed up all my stuff, and on August 22, 2014, got in my car and drove to Boston stopping in Columbus and D.C. on the way. It’s been 5 weeks of craziness. New city, new apartment, new roommates, new job, new everything. The first few weeks were so hectic I didn’t have a second to just stop and absorb it all. And now I am finally at a point where I am slowing down and taking it all in.

Moving to a new city is a big deal. There is so much to explore, so much to learn. New commute to work. New places to eat. New people to meet.

I’ve learned a great deal about myself in these few weeks. I’ve learned how much I truly and genuinely enjoy my alone time. I’ve learned how much I appreciate the quiet. I’ve not only learned to love silence, but I also need it in my life.

People can be so afraid of solitude. So afraid of silence. Sometimes we wrap ourselves up with business and meaningless noise just so we don’t have to be alone with our thoughts, alone with ourselves. But I know these things are vital to my happiness and my sanity.

Life can be so busy, but it’s so important to take the time to slow down and go within, to listen to those thoughts, to reflect on your life, to just be you.

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Live The Life You Want To Live

The American life is interesting.

It’s not always great.

It’s not always bad.

But it is interesting.

We have so much freedom in America. Or at least it seems we do. Or at least we do in comparison to other countries. We have the right to free speech– which really is the most amazing thing. I am forever grateful for this right.

Americans are also given the right to the pursuit of happiness. But, I think this really throws people for a loop. Why? Well, it’s not the right to happiness, but rather, the right to the pursuit of happiness. What does this mean?

I think it means that we have the right to chase after happiness– to go for the gold, to be ambitious, to try and get what we want.

So, is that problematic? Not exactly. Not in and of itself, no. But I do think it throws people off, so to speak, because this chase– this consistent need to achieve and gain something– keeps us in a constant state of motion where we are always after the next goal. We haven’t even stopped to enjoy the kill before we are off attacking our next prey.

I think this is why happiness alludes so many Americans. I speak to America because I am an American and I am not knowledgable enough about other countries and cultures to speak about their levels of happiness and contentment.

I think we all need to stop for a second, or at least slow down, and ask ourselves, “What exactly does the life I want to live look like?” Not the life someone else has or wants– not the life society, the media, or our parents tell us we should want– but the life we actually desire. Maybe that life doesn’t include a million dollars. Is that okay? Fuck yeah, you better believe it is. I think ambition goes a long way, but pure joy that comes from within goes a lot further.

Some people are going to be happy with corporate or office jobs. Other people are going to be happy teaching in a classroom. Some will be happy as painters, writers, and musicians. Some people will be happy working retail or cleaning houses. The point is that we need to do what will make our lives truly content by doing what is naturally calling to us. This is what that freedom– that right that is given to us– could mean. It’s possible that your calling will mean you become a PhD or a CEO. And that’s awesome. But if your calling is to be a mechanic, a stay-at-home mom, or an aspiring artist, then that’s equally awesome.

This same calling can be attributed to all parts of our lives– not just our careers and jobs. It’s in everything. It’s in how you look, what your hobbies are, how you keep your house, etc. You can observe and notice what other people are doing, but ultimately, you need only take what works for you and leave the rest. Be yourself. Be wholly and unabashedly you. And then love every teensy-weensy part of it.

We are all one and we are all in this together. No one is better. No one is worse. We are all equal. Don’t compete for what other people want– just go after what you truly and genuinely want for yourself. Find your calling from within and you can find joy in this life.

Namaste. Xo

Acceptance

I accept myself 100%. I am troubled sometimes, yes, but I am learning. My eyes are closed sometimes, yes, but mostly they are open. I have setbacks, yes, but everyday, hour, and moment is a chance to start over. I am starting over. I have strong emotions, yes, but this makes me genuine, passionate, and expressive, and I am learning to express them in healthy ways. This is beauty. I have expectations sometimes, yes, but I am learning to let them go. I worry and have anxiety sometimes, yes, but I am learning to breathe in the present moment. The here and now. I have needs, yes, but I am learning to express them. I still need other people, yes, but it is becoming less and less because I am learning to give myself what I need. My vibration goes negative sometimes, yes, but I am learning to realign it to a more positive vibration. I still get sad sometimes, yes, but I am learning to be happier. I still have more to learn, yes, but I am learning to recognize my improvements and give myself some credit. I don’t have to be perfect because I am perfect just the way I am. I still put my star in other people’s hands sometime, yes, but I am learning to take it back and keep it in my own hands. I reject my experiences sometimes, yes, but I know that Karma has agreements with my soul that have already been made and that I need to accept all of my experiences. I forget to trust the Universe sometimes, yes, but I know that I can trust it and that it’s always taking care of me.

I am lucky.

I am grateful.

I am love.

I am lucky.

I am grateful.

I am love.

Cheers, tears, and self-love,

-A Xo

How Do You Love?

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  1. I trust.
  2. I give love without the intention of receiving.
  3. I don’t take things personally.
  4. I am impeccable with my word.
  5. I do not make any assumptions.
  6. I ask questions.
  7. I am clear.
  8. I am honest.
  9. I always do my best.
  10. I accept fully.
  11. I forgive, immediately.
  12. I don’t try to control.
  13. I let myself experience my emotions.
  14. I let things be.
  15. I am grateful.
  16. I listen.
  17. I take good care of myself.
  18. I say “no” when necessary.
  19. I make my own decisions.
  20. I support.
  21. I give space.
  22. I keep learning.
  23. I love myself first.
  24. I don’t fear, worry, or reject.
  25. I observe, notice.
  26. I see everything with love.
  27. I remember that I am love.
  28. I don’t have expectations.
  29. I hold myself responsible.
  30. I know I am not a victim.
  31. I remember I have power.
  32. I give myself credit.
  33. I shine my light.
  34. I do not judge.
  35. I let emotion out in healthy ways.
  36. I remember I’m strong.
  37. I know it’s okay not to be perfect.
  38. I let my soul heal in the ways it needs to.
  39. I meditate.

How do you love?

Patience as a Value

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Patience.

Does anyone really have it?

Yes, of course. They must! I, unfortunately, have found patience to be one of the most difficult things to possess. It’s hard to conjure up, it’s hard to keep once I do have it, and it’s hard to recognize that I’m being impatient in the first place.

But yet, it’s so important.

And why exactly is it so important?

It’s important because it contributes to happiness and inner peace. I think a lack of patience can lead to anxiety and unhappy feelings. And, really, why are we always in such a rush anyway? Why don’t we accept more things as they are? If things were supposed to be moving faster, then… wouldn’t they be moving faster?

My biggest problem with patience comes when I want something to happen. Nothing can move fast enough and I will impatiently wait for this “thing” to happen. And you know what? That “thing” happens and nothing really changes. Being impatient is like waiting for the future, and while you wait for the future, you miss the present moment, the here and now, your true life.

What is life if not your present moment? Sure, we have memories of the past, and we think about the future, but are those real-life? Not really. Your real life is the moment that is happening right this second in front of you. My life right now is writing this article. Your life right now is reading this article. Nothing else really matters. If you can enjoy this very moment, then you can be happy. And if you live every moment that way, then wouldn’t you always be happy?

It sounds so easy, and I know it gets easier and easier the more you practice, but I don’t think it starts off that way. I do think, though, that there is a direct link between patience and happiness. Being patient means that you can see the value of your present moment and you’re not just looking forward to the next thing. When that next thing does happen, great! But being impatient means stressing and over-thinking, distracting yourself from your reality. And that’s where unhappiness begins.

So, how do we cultivate patience? I think it’s about always staying in the present moment, in the here and now. Make every moment count. Make every interaction matter. Be thankful for each and every moment you have and really live each and everyone of them. That’s your reality. That’s your happiness.

Start by believing it. Try meditating on positive statements such as: I am patient. I am a patient person. I can be patient. I have patience. I have the power to be patient. I am patient. 

Pitch it out there and the Universe will hear you.

Cheers, tears, and self-love,

-A xo

p.s. The here and now, baby!

 

Decision-Making: What’s this now?

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Part of self-love is being confident in your decision-making.

I’ve been thinking about the concept of “decision-making” a whole ton lately. How do I know if I’m making good decisions? If I make a decision, and a not-so-great consequence happens, do I conclude then that I am not a good decision-maker? Does it mean that maybe I just don’t know how to make decisions at all?

But if everyone makes “mistakes” and we all find ourselves faced with negative consequences from time to time (since we all know that is a part of life), then what does good decision-making look like?

Here’s what I’ve come up with: (Feel free to share your thoughts)

Making good decisions means following my heart at the time the decision is being made. Whatever my heart tells me to do, that’s the good decision. Another word for heart may be intuition. Each of has our own unique way of following our hearts/intuition. Call it whatever you want, I believe the concept is the same.

I know there are people who will disagree with this. They may say that we need our brains, our minds, more than anything. However, I believe if we use our minds too much, our egos may err on the side of worry and fear and consider the future or past experiences too much.

What I have to say is this: I believe the heart does this kind of juicy stuff anyway, but in a less ego-like way. I believe the heart considers the past, the present, and the future while it’s guiding you into making a decision. I think the heart knows to consider what you’ve learned from experiences in the past and your heart is mindful of your future self, and it has the ability to connect these two states to the present moment, to the here and now, and then it allows you to know what it best for you.

What this translates to is that if you’ve been following your heart when making your decisions, then you don’t need to question what you’ve done in the past, what you are doing right now, or what you are going to do in the future because each and every one of the decisions that got you here were all right.

“Mistakes” are only opportunities to learn and grow. They are not reasons a decision shouldn’t have been made. Hogwash! “Mistakes” are not reasons something shouldn’t have happened. What hooey! “Mistakes” just indicate there is something to be gained and learned, and that it’s time to choose differently.

Align your truth with your heart and you will always get to where you are supposed to be. It’s then that we can be safe and secure and know we are making good decisions. If you are following your heart right now, then this is exactly where you are supposed to be. If you’re experiencing a “mistake” then ask yourself what you can learn (and keep in mind that the shadow is just part of the journey).

When we find our truths and align it with our hearts, we can be anywhere we want to be.

In conclusion, if I my life by this value, living my truth and following my heart, then I really cannot make poor decisions and there really is no such thing as bad decision-making.

How do I find my truth? I find my truth by doing my best, taking responsibility for myself, working towards an even better version of myself, all the while loving and forgiving myself and those around me deeply.

To all the self-lover discoverers out there!

Cheers, tears, and love,

-A xo

I don’t only love, I am love.

Unabashed Love

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Here I am again today, filled with love and more love.

Love and more love. Pure, unabashed love.

I can feel it in my toes all the way through my entire body up through my neck and my mouth. I am breathing in love. I am breathing out love.

I let it in and I let it out. I am full and full of love.

It’s so soft and smooth and warm. It feels like a baby’s skin. Baby skin is love. Love is baby skin.

I am love. You are love. We are all love.

All people are made of love. We are made from love. Not just romantic love, but pure, unabashed, unadulterated love.

Sometimes I think we don’t have the language to express the love we are made of.

But I can feel it. I can sense it. I know what it is without necessarily being able to express it. It makes me smile. It makes me giggle. It feels good. It is love and it is beautiful.

What does love feel like to you?

Goodbye

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Today I am making a choice.

Today I choose that I will NO LONGER have anxiety.

I rid myself of it. Starting today. No more.

I have been making excuses for my anxiety. I have been rationalizing my anxiety. I have been forgiving of my anxiety. I have even been THANKFUL for my anxiety.

But starting today, I do not want it in my life. Today I am done with it.

I am powerful. I am strong. I am the master of my universe.

Today I decide that I do not want anxiety. And today will be the day that I no longer have anxiety.

I am thankful for any and all knowledge I have gained from having it in the past, and with that acknowledgment and gratitude, I rid myself of it.

See ya! Sayonara! Farewell! Adiós!

Peace!

 

Namaste. :)

Love Overflowing

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Have you ever felt like love is literally pouring out of you?

That is how I feel right now. I am literally filled with so much love, happiness, and joy that it is seeping out of the pores of my body.

Nothing happened. Nothing changed. Well, that’s not exactly true. Something big happened last night (my niece was born!) so I am sure that is contributing to my love today. BUT, nothing happened in the last few minutes to fill my heart with as much love as it has right now.

It just happened. It’s more like I just noticed it. I noticed the massive amount of love in my heart, my soul, my bones. It’s in my gut. I have SO much love right now.

I think people intentionally stop themselves from living with this much love. I think people are afraid of love sometimes. Maybe this stems from a fear of being hurt, or a fear that someone may not love you back. But I challenge this thinking. My love is so pure and so real and so gentle that it is not there because of its desire to be loved back. The love just exists on its own! It’s amazing. It’s an amazing feeling. Wow. It’s so pure. My guess is that love that is there solely to be loved back is not real, true, genuine love. A love that is filled with fear is also not real love.

When you put yourself out there, you run the risk of getting hurt, sure. But when you simultaneously tell yourself (and truly believe) that you can handle ANY and ALL consequences that may arise, you are so much freer. It is liberating not to live in fear. It is liberating to have confidence and to know that you can handle anything. Because you can! We are all warriors. We are all so strong. Think about how much people have endured. Challenges only make us stronger. We are such lucky creatures. We can love and love and love and love and love. We can have an abundance of love. And we don’t need anything in return. We can just love. And it can just feel that good.

Hmm… my heart is filled with love. It is warm and wonderful. My heart feels safe and protected because it is surrounded by beautiful, beautiful love.

Is there anything strong enough to pierce through love?

I guess that will be something this experiment can help me find out. But I am feeling so confident right now that I am not afraid of that.